Skylite!

Where I live we have these tasty summer treats called snowballs. They are not snow cones, they are snowballs. There are little shed type stands open in spring and close in fall all over town. You go to get your crushed up ice with choice of flavor and the amazing marshmallow topping. 

Growing up my family would always stop by the snowball stand on Friday evenings coming home from piano lessons. Occasionally there was a variation in what my dad might order, but usually the order was three spearmints and one skylite. Spearmint is pretty self-explanatory, it was green and minty. I did not like it. I go for skylite- it is a lovely blue that turns your whole mouth the same color, and tastes like a mix of vanilla and blue raspberry. 

I think this was probably an early example in my life, but I've realized I am a very different kind of person than my family members. We are all unique, and I think realizing this is true of each of our stories in some way. I feel like we have to reckon with that as we figure out what our path looks like versus what those closest to us might choose in our situation. And honestly, I don't think I realize how hard that is. Separating and really listening to yourself outside of the opinions are expectations of others and that you've even put on yourself without realizing it to live up to a certain way.

So in a world that wants everyone to look like spearmint, figure out what it looks like for you to be your flavor. And go for it! We need your flavor. 

Patience and a Gentle Tongue

This morning I read Proverbs 25:15 which says:

"Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone."

I had two conversations today that seemed to show both sides of this verse. One where I was on the receiving end of somebody's opinions and observations, and one where I was on the giving end.

The first was me on the giving end. I was talking with someone I value and trust, and they didn't necessarily accept or agree with the opinions and thoughts I presented. They're really good at playing devil's advocate, and asking good questions. I'm not sure if this is just something that I appreciate, but I feel like seeing something from all the sides helps me understand it better and think through it more fully. Atleast when I'm in the right mood to hear it and approach it knowing I don't have all the answers... which I understand is not always the temperament we/I approach things with. As a result I feel like I was able to be patient in the conversation and talk about things calmly and with a gentle tongue. It went well and we were able to see things from other perspectives and work them out more in depth. I'm still taking those words to heart and considering them in my decisions. I don't know that I changed their opinion, but I'm okay with that because the conversation helped me grow and have broader perspective. I have more to consider a d feel like my final decision will be more well rounded.

In the other conversation, I was on the receiving end. Someone was expressing their thoughts and opinions to me, and in order for me to understand and take it in, I was asking a lot of questions. To fully understand and form opinions I like to see things from all sides. None of it was malicious or with any endgame result in mind other than fully being able to understand and comprehend the situation. However I was met with surprising anger and frustration about me not being on the same page and seeing it the same way. Not being able to work through it with patience and gentle words made the experience unpleasant. The conversation was shut down because I was not at the same place as the other person. It surprised me, because I was still working through things and had more questions. It makes me less likely to want to have conversations and ask questions. It makes me feel like I need to feel wrong or guilty for not immediately being where someone else is, even though I know that is not accurate.

Funny how life and scripture team up to be a powerful teacher. Seeing this first hand, I hope to be more patient and gentle when I am met with different opinions and situations. The fruit seems to be much fuller.