SH3

I found out today that it is official- my ACL is blown out and I need to get surgery.  : / << That face is because I have never really had surgery and it makes me feel all queasy inside.  I have really been trying to pray about the whole situation and I have received some peace knowing that the God who designed and created each and every part of me… the one who knows my insides- thoughts and organs- better than any surgeon/doctor/therapist/psychologist etc. ever could is in control.  If he wanted to he could put my ACL back in less than a second, so there is definitely purpose to where he has me and what he has allowed to happen in this temporary earthly body.

I don’t know if you have ever experienced such a thing (I hope you have not and never will) but it is weird.  It hurt at first, but most of the physical pain has subsided now.  The trouble is lack of stability.  It is weird… I am building confidence back in my knee but with the injury fresh in my mind and it still being somewhat swollen- I feel like it could just slide out at any moment (which obviously doesn’t build mental confidence in my knee).

Sadly it made me realize that is kind of how my walk with God has gotten without realizing it.  There are “two legs” in this image of my spiritual body- the first leg is my personal relationship with Christ and the other leg is Christian community- one stable leg and one “torn ACL”.  It has been easier to control my personal time with God recently- but through this injury it is a reminder that that is not enough to stand on.  I can’t just hop everywhere on that- my leg gets tired and burns out- it needs to be refreshed and supplemented with community as well.  Recently that has been quite unstable for me which makes it hard to want to stand on it, but I am being reminded that I need both.  One just will not due, you can’t walk with one leg… you just kind of hop or crutch and it is really tiring.

So hopefully on this journey of physical recovery, it will also be one to reconstruct my spiritual ACL as well!